This and That

I have decided to number this post with the tidbits that are circling my life at the moment.  In no particular order:

1.  This is a crazy week.  Not only is it the week before spring break (does someone want to tell my kids to lay off the sugar in the morning?), it's full as well.  Yesterday, we had a staff meeting after school and I went to yoga.  Today, we have a bullying assembly during school (which changes our normal schedule) and also are meeting with the people putting on the assembly after school for another staff meeting.  I'm also meeting with one of my IRL IF friends tonight for coffee since I can't make my RE's office's IF meeting Wednesday.  Wednesday, I have the viewing of the mother of one of my student's (she lost a long standing battle with cancer this past weekend) and then a cooking class my mom and dad got H and I as a Christmas present.  Thursday, I'm free, but I'll need to pack/organize because on Friday, I leave for a weekend in Nashville with my best girls.

2.  This week in WW I lost 1 pound.  Normally, that would be something to celebrate, but considering I gained 0.6 last week, this only nets me a loss of 0.4.  Still good, but doesn't average well over the two weeks.  I'm still going in the right direction, but I'm not where I'd hoped to be at this point.  I'm overall down 11 pounds (I think?) but that still leaves me 9 away from my goal.  I also made a mental deal with myself that I would be happiest if I was X weight before getting pregnant.  I am 1.5 pounds from that mental goal.  Now, I'm irrationally worried that the universe won't let me get pregnant until I'm at the weight, meaning this cycle is already a bust.  Irrational, I know.

3.  I have been feeling rather numb about the whole IF thing lately.  Not upset, not hopeful, just numb.  A kind of "it is what it is" viewpoint.  I even talked to H about it this past weekend, since it's so unlike me (emotionally speaking).  I'm the kind of person you know how I'm feeling.  I'm terrible at hiding my emotions, so numbness is a new feeling for me.  Of course then, I had a college friend announce her pregnancy on FB yesterday.  She's the kind of friend you consider close, but may or may not talk to on a regular basis.  Her announcement grabbed me in the gut and twisted.  Hard.  I had no idea they were trying.  Actually, I have no idea how long they've been trying (although they were married this past summer, so I can't imagine it's been long).  I honestly thought I was past the point of getting upset about pregnancy announcements.  Apparently not.  It pulled up emotions in me I haven't felt since before our pregnancy.  What I realized (while hanging upside in up-dog at yoga) was that I haven't had any close friends announce pregnancies since we found out about ours.  So I wasn't so much over the whole thing, as I hadn't had any reason to test myself in a long time.

4.  Only four more school days until break.  I can do this.