Anxious

I wish I hadn't kept up with temping this cycle.  Or monitoring my normal fertility signs.  It's making me absolutely insane. 

For the last several days I've had watery CM (which is as fertile as mine normally gets).  Then, Saturday I had a pretty sizable temperature jump.  I did have two beers Friday night, but normally that amount of alcohol wouldn't account for that much of an increase.  I had more alcohol last night and my temp this morning wasn't as high as Saturday's (although still in my normal post-O range).

So I'm worried.  I'm worried that O day was Friday.  I'm worried my temp spiked because I ovulated on Friday.  I'm worried because my CM has moved to sticky today (a normal transition for me after O).  I have been taking OPKs.  I haven't gotten a positive, but I didn't start them until Friday (CD 10).  It's possible I surged before then, so I didn't catch it on the OPK.

I know most of this has to be my mind playing tricks on me.  I know I can't trust my temps during a medicated cycle.  I know medications can change up normal fertility cues.  I was at the RE's office on Friday.  If that's the day I did in fact ovulate, wouldn't he have seen signs, and told me so?

And even with Clomid, why oh why, do I think I could ovulate on day 10?  Is that even possible given my past ovulation track record?

I was talking it over with one of the girls from my support group yesterday.  She told me I just have to trust that Dr. C knows what he's doing.  And I think she hit the nail right on the head.  I have to trust that when he saw me on Friday, he prescribed the best course of action for me, for this cycle. 

I just wish it all wasn't so damn nerve wracking.

.... and I really wish I didn't have to give myself an injection tonight.  I'm not terribly fond of needles.